Assignment 10 - Victor Allison

Ian Schaeffer. Gross. Upon the sound of his name, images of villainous German Luftwaffe pilots flash across the mind's visual spectrum. However, after meeting this gangly, pale boy one cannot help feeling more than a little underwhelmed. A bent nose and unkempt haystack of grimy hair adorn the crown of this pink-faced prince of pubescence. Although not physically inept, Ian prefers to spend his time indoors playing chess with himself and reading rather than venturing into the vast wilderness of opportunity that boyhood offers. In addition to chess, it has been rumored that the bony young schaeffer finds a great deal of pleasure in his room toying with his calculator much like a certain Tolkein character might spend his days caressing the one all-powerful ring. Those close to him maintain that furiously scribbling math equations is this unfortunate soul's true following, rather than the pompous prep school hobbies of lacrosse and recreational soccer that he claims to enjoy.